Struggling after surrendering my beloved pet last month

[bunnymumma33]

Hi everyone, I’m new here so really would appreciate the support. One month ago I made the heartbreaking decision to surrender my beloved pet rabbit. Since that day I’ve been completely shut out of any decision regarding my pet rabbit. For a month I had no idea where he was. My bunny’s vet never updated me. Nor did the organization that is in charge of the foster carer arrangements and putting his up for adoption. I found out literally last week via a Google Search where he is. I cant fully explain how soul crushing it is that I had to find out via an Google search. Seriously wtf!? The fact I’ve been locked out of anything regarding him fucking hurts so badly.
I’m just a faceless pet owner who’s been labelled “bad” because I cant afford to care for him anymore. I hate it!
I hate how no-one has shown any compassion, sympathy or anything towards me since that fucking awful day. I hate how all i want is for him to be mine again. I want him back in my life. He is my emotional support animal. He helped me with my anxiety, depression and PTSD. He is my best friend! I hate that some stranger is taking care of him. I hate that he’s not being given his favorite treats or hay. I feel like I’m stuck on a terrible nightmare and I want to wake up so desperately but I can’t. I want everything to go back to before this awful reality. I want him back in my life. i want to be his Bunny Mumma still. I am honestly not happy with any of this and feel so alone….
Would love for anyone else in a similar situation struggling with the guilt, the sadness, the anger, and constant waves of grief that constantly consume me 24/7….

Topic

[VM-Serenity66]

@bunnymumma losing a pet for any reason hurts terribly and it sounds especially conflicting for you since you took the courageous and selfless decision to look after his interests above your own. Now that other animal lovers are taking care of him, I wonder, is it time to take good care of yourself? You mentioned anxiety, depression and PTSD and it sounds like animal companionship was a great support to you. Some mindfulness activities (https://griefline.org.au/resources/mindfulness-for-grief/) might be helpful to process your painful feelings, and reaching out to our Helpline volunteers, while it can never replace your companion, might help if you need extra support for now.

[VM-rose]

Hello @bunnymumma, I am deeply sorry to hear about the loss of your beautiful rabbit. I can’t imagine how hard this is for you. I was also a bunny mama and both have since passed away, so I understand the special connection shared with these amazing creatures. I just want to acknowledge how much strength and courage it has taken for you to share your personal experience here on the Griefline forum. I also want to let you know that grief is a personal and unique experience for every individual and your feelings are completely natural. Perhaps you could continue your relationship with your beloved rabbit by speaking to him and writing down your thoughts. This is a great way to express yourself and release your emotions. You could also create a photo album that includes beautiful memories of your time together. It’s also important to engage in self-care practices and treat yourself with compassion. Engaging with a support network is also a very important aspect of the grieving process. You can call the Griefline on 1300 845 745 between the hours of 8am and 8pm, 7 days a week. You can also request a callback at a time that suits you. Here is the Griefline resources page: https://griefline.org.au/resources. There are also some great insights and coping strategies in our article ‘Losing a Pet’ here: https://griefline.org.au/resources/losing-a-pet. Continue to keep in touch through this online forum and take care of yourself. We are here to listen and support you.

[bunnymumma33]

Sadly I won’t know who adopts him. It’s part of their surrender policy. So when he is adopted I will have no idea where he is. Hopefully when that day comes and hes no longer on the adoption webpage I’ll find peace and acceptance. I don’t want to contact Rabbit Sanctuary as he’s already in their care. And I don’t want to be rude as they are caring for him. And that’s the best thing for him!

[bunnymumma33]

Very very true. The day I surrendered him I didn’t just take him anywhere. I ensured he was surrendered at his exotic vet. I didn’t just want anyone caring for him. I made a responsible choice. And since then his vet (even if I’m furious at them for being the reason I surrendered him) made the right decision for him to be in the care of Rabbit Sanctuary organisation. I’ve made a fake FB account to keep track of updates on him from the foster carer. He looks like he’s recovering, eating and generally feeling safe. One photo he had his back legs kicked out. So he must be somewhat happy. I’m learning slowly I need to accept this scary new reality without him. I need to learn it’s okay to say goodbye. It’s okay to let him go. It’s okay to share him. And I did everything right for him. I surrendered him with food, blankets and reminders of Mr. It feels weird seeing those items and him elsewhere. I guess time is the only answer to my healing. Time, patience and kindness. Finding my new purpose without him. Learning to breathe without him. And learn that when the day arrives that I can find peace and move forward. It’s okay. One day I’ll get there.

[VM_karina34]

Hi bunnymumma33,
I am so sorry to hear how much you are struggling at the moment, and I just wanted to let you know that the grief you are feeling is completely valid. Your beloved bunny is no longer a part of your daily life, even though he is still alive and well. It’s only natural that you are experiencing pain similar to what someone would feel when experiencing the death of a loved one.

But perhaps there is a way for you to shift your focus to the positive aspects? Firstly, you did right by your pet by surrendering him and giving him the chance to find a home where his care can be afforded. This was a very tough decision that required you to be responsible and keep his best interests in mind. Secondly, he is still around, alive, and being well looked after. I’m sure he will find a loving home.

Have you tried contacting the organization to find out if you can get updates on him? Have you found out whether he has been adopted yet?

[Author]

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