My husband, my best friend, my anchor, my person, my one is gone!

[nay15722]

On the 27 June 2022, my partner of 31 years / husband of 25 years was admitted to hospital for what seemed to be a fairly minor cause. Blow after blow came until he passed away 19 days later at 49 years old, leaving me without my soul. To make matters worse, we had been travelling the country after selling up. This now leaves me in a situation where I cannot continue with his dream of travelling and now having to find somewhere to live and work while attempting to sort through the chaos that is left behind after his devastatingly rapid demise. A friend has given me a place to stay while I sort things out but seeing them with their partner just reminds me of what I’ve lost when my person died.

I’m lost, displaced, lonely, shocked, shattered, scared and sick with covid.

Topic

[VM-M&M]

Dear @nay15722,
Thank you so much for being vulnerable and sharing how you currently feel. I am so sorry for your unexpected loss and that you are feeling lost, displaced, lonely, shocked and shattered—all this whilst dealing with being sick with covid.

The death of your loved one can be extremely traumatic, especially when it is not expected. I can’t begin to imagine how painful it must be to see friends with their partners when you have been left without your soul from your loss.

It’s natural to experience all the emotions you are feeling. Especially you are also dealing with finding a new home and work. As I read that you are looking for somewhere to live and work whilst dealing with this, I get a sense of your courage and strength.

Yet I feel the overwhelming heaviness of sorting your way through the chaos has put on you. Your ability to find the online forums at Griefline and be open and honest in reaching out shows that you have immense strength within yourself and the resilience to get through this chaos.

I’m just wondering what has been happening for you since your loss. Have you been able to eat, sleep or engage in any exercise?

It sounds as if you have supportive friends. If you need further support you may like to call the helpline at Griefline on 1300845745 – 6 am to 12 midnight to chat with a volunteer about your feeling.

Griefline has many online recourses, especially related to the loss of a loved one. This link may be helpful: https://griefline.org.au/resources/grief-recovery-part-1-in-search-of-lost-strengths/

Continue to keep in touch through this forum, and take care. You are not alone, and we are here for you.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 8 months ago by onlinecommunity.

[vmzinnia]

Hello @nay15722, I am so sorry for your loss of your husband. It sounds like this happened in very sudden and unexpected circumstances and I can hear you are feeling so many different emotions at the moment, it sounds like such a challenging time. I want to acknowledge that you are dealing with multiple losses and changes in your life. You are so strong to get through each day and I want to encourage you to keep going. I wonder where have you found this strength or what has helped you cope so far?

Although losing such an important person and such big life changes is something we never really ‘get over’, it does get easier to cope with time. Reaching out for support or to share how you are feeling can help so I’m really glad you’ve joined the forums. This is a supportive community and it can help you connect with other who have experienced similar losses. This can help reduce the sense of isolation and loneliness that comes with grief.

I wonder if you’ve had a look at the information on the Griefline website? These articles have some helpful times about strategies that can be helpful in really difficult times –

EAST – Connecting to Healthy Routines

Tools For Rest and Relaxation

[Author]

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