I’m sorry to hear this. It sounds like you’re sad over the end of this relationship, and frustrated that he was not putting effort into maintaining, and later repairing the relationship. It is normal to feel this way, especially since you had a strong emotional connection with him.
I’m wondering if the tips mentioned in https://griefline.org.au/resources/relationship-loss/ will be helpful to you as you process the end of your relationship. https://griefline.org.au/resources/east-toolkit/ also has suggestions on how you can take care of yourself during this time- from eating regular meals, participating in activities you enjoy, having healthy sleep habits and spending time with people around you.
I just want to end this post by acknowledging your strength in reaching out to us. Keep writing and sharing your story on this forum- we’re here to listen. If you would like to talk to someone, feel free to call the helpline at 1300 845 745 from 6am-12am AEDT.