Reply To: My sweet Sayge

[debsayge]

Dearest beautiful as reading here are some words my caring friend sent me and I wish to share and dedicate them to you moon and grieving mumma and all here struggling

“As you wake to another lonely day, struggling to find purpose in anything. The strength you hold just to get out of bed and face yet another day without her touch, conversation and companionship is something few people recognise behind your tears. I see it. You may not, and feel guilt and other emotions about not coping. Try not to as they are all projections. You are doing this in your own! Authenticity. That’s what I have always loved about you!

This just s for you all and I’m hoping it helps just a tiny bit, it helps me to feel ! Seen even if just in that moment….

I’m trying to understand the projections but, all the hopeless despair, guilt, I’m finding that just so difficult as this totally broken bereft mumma who seems to just turn it all on myself is so crushing, the listless and longing for what should be! That Sayge is missing out on, that I can’t and don’t want to do Any Thing without my loving girl….it’s all too much for this deeply caring Mumma, my life revolved around my children and our happy future,all I wanted was what I had living authentic caring children…. how do we live in a world without them, where horror is real and they are taken, how do we do this, I just don’t know….
Thanks all for listening to my sobbing this (another) morning
XxLove to you all today and every harder day
Deb