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Hey SBS, So sorry to hear about your loss – and good on you for having the strength to reach out. So many can’t bring themselves to let out their feelings, or bear to think that others might witness their emotions, so I really want to just say props to you for reaching out.
Siblings can be especially hard to process because -while you might not even be super close- siblings often have lots more history than a mate… and it’s generally less expected than, say, losing a parent… even when they’re sick, like your brother was.
I lost my big sister to lung cancer in 2020 – just as Covid was starting, so I at least managed to travel to Wagga and say goodbye.
I cannot imagine how hard it must’ve been for you not to be able to do that for your brother – but the loss you instinctively felt at his passing speaks volumes.
I think I know what you mean about being “terrible at grief”… but not to worry, as not many are naturals at it – but you’ve really made a great start by reaching out like you have.
We’re here for you, mate.