Hi tiki2072016 – I totally relate to how you feel. The new reality of living without the one you so loved means living with the yearning to be with that person, and, I guess, re-wiring your brain to experience the present as a new normal. I’m not sure when that new normal ‘kicks in’ but I would imagine it would take a long time and one will never not miss the person who has gone from your life. My niece said something so true to me the other day (it was her mum who died): that my sister would want us to create our own new memories to make us happy when we reflect. It is so hard to know how one is going to feel ‘on the day’ when you organise to meet up with people, but I think it is important to try to plan things with other people to get your mind from the ‘inside’ and distracted by social life. Be kind to yourself and this forum is a great place to be safe and share.