The Death of a Pet can hurt as much as the loss of a relative

[onlinecommunity]

Hi everyone,

This recent article in the Washington Post gives an honest portrayal of the devastation we can feel when we lose our beloved companion animal. It’s good to see there’s a growing understanding in the community of just how intense grief can be after losing a pet. Feel free to reach out if you’re struggling or even if you’re getting through ok and have some coping strategies to share…we’d love to hear from you. 🌸

https://www.washingtonpost.com/national/health-science/the-death-of-pet-can-hurt-as-much-as-the-loss-of-a-relative/2012/02/21/gIQALXTXcS_story.html?fbclid=IwAR1bPnDUjiGuU1AFhM20usJz0GqLchkjJ1OnVtBTvd0zJoULPT7-oGSAJGw

Topic

[Kerry]

Thanks for posting this. My little girl (dog) died 12 weeks ago today and I am still struggling so much. She was 17 and we had been together since she was 6 months old. When I’m having a bad day (like today) I seem to focus on all the negative things – the times she was sick, or questioning whether I made the right choice at the end. I also think that I may not have allowed myself to grieve fully when my little boy (dog) died two years ago, and it’s coming out now as well. I’m not looking after myself properly, and I’m sleeping very badly. But, this article really helped. Thanks.

[BabyMushu]

I’m trying to cope with losing my cat. He was not even 4 years old. And the death was a shock cause there was no visible signs of anything being wrong. The vet thinks it was a heart attack. He was my first baby. I now have a 18 month old daughter and she and our cat Mushu were the best of friends, they always played gently with each other and she would laugh just by looking at him. Every night he would sleep between me and my partners heads but he always need my arm to put his front paws on. Now everything feels empty and every day feels worse. I don’t know how to live with this loss. I’m in desperate need of some guidance if anyone out there’s has lost a pet they loved like their own child.

[Kerry]

@BabyMushu I’m so sorry to hear about the loss of your beautiful Mushu, and it must be so much harder for you given how sudden it seems to have been. I wish I could say something to comfort and help you. My little girl Chloe (dog) died in December. I had some very dark, low months. The things that helped me the most were: to talk about her with people who love animals, and who didn’t tell me to get over it or ask when I was going to get another pet. I think it’s hard for most people to talk about death but I think it’s an incredibly important part of grieving. Second, to remind myself of the crazy quirky things she used to do that made me laugh. Some of my favourite photos of her are of an expression on her face, or a way she used to sit etc. I still look through a lot of photos and am reminded of her beautiful crazy ways, and it helps. Third, I bought a necklace which meant something special to me – the pendant is two infinity symbols entwined together – one for my little girl and one for my little boy, who died over two years ago now. I wear it every day – not as a reminder of them exactly, but a reminder of the bond we had and still have. And it reminds me that they will always be in my heart. I hope this helps a little.

• This reply was modified 3 years, 4 months ago by Kerry.
• This reply was modified 3 years, 4 months ago by Kerry.

[onlinecommunity]

Dear @Kerry, a very warm welcome to the forums. We wanted to thank you for your empathetic and helpful post in response to @BabyMushu’s. Your suggestions for ways to continue bonds with a pet just as you have done with your beloved dog was really insightful. It’s amazing how therapeutic it can be to enjoy those precious memories and we agree, it’s so important to keep their memory alive. Back in late March, you mentioned that you were finding things tough and not sleeping well. We wanted to check-in and see how you are faring now…if you are still struggling with sleep perhaps take a look at this article Tips to Improve Sleep from the Griefline Resource Hub.
Hopefully just knowing you are helping others by sharing your experience brings you some light in your day.
We’d love to hear how you are going. We’re here for you. 🌸

[Author]

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