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My friend and his wife died last week

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Home Forums Loss of a loved one My friend and his wife died last week

  • Creator
  • #24345

    My friend and his wife went swimming at the beach. She got caught in a rip current and he swam out to rescue her. Lifeguards and police tried to revive them but they didn’t make it.
    His last words were typically unselfish, saying “save my wife!”.

    They leave behind 3 kids, 2 with high medical needs. The kids are being cared for by relatives.

    I’m gutted and shocked and feeling every kind of emotion. I didn’t get the chance to know her but he was the warmest person. They we’re very doting parents too.

    Her funeral has been announced. I’m waiting to hear when his will be.

Viewing 3 replies - 1 through 3 (of 3 total)
  • Author
  • #24351

    Dear Jenv,

    How very heartbroken you must be feeling for the tragic loss of your friend and his wife.

    Your current emotions of possible disbelief, numbness, anger and crying are normal experiences of grief and loss and each person experiences it differently. These intense feelings can make it hard to think at times when you become overwhelmed by the sensations that your body experiences.

    With the up-and-coming funerals, you may experience an outpouring of grief and loss due to the tragic loss of lives which will impact so many families and friends.

    Some tips Griefline has for you during this time are to reach out to others for comfort and compassion and allow yourself some quiet time when you need it to deal with your feelings. Reach out to new people, spiritual if so inclined, work EPAs if offered, and the griefline forum (which you have done). Allow yourself to cry – the outpouring is necessary for the body to heal, and engage in your normal routine this helps with a sense of purpose during a time that can seem surreal.

    During this time please reach out to griefline helpline 1800 845 745 and lifeline 13 11 14 for additional support. Griefline website has a number of resources that can be helpful. Book a call (on our website) for a date and time that suits you especially leading up to or after the funerals so that you have additional support to help you during this time.

    You are not alone and you have been heard.

    Be kind to yourself and take care during this mourning period.


    Hi Jenv,

    It makes so much sense that you would be feeling shocked and emotional after such a sudden, tragic, and unexpected loss. Your friend sounds like an incredible and loving person who had so much to give to all those he loved. I too lost a friend very suddenly and unexpectedly who also left behind a young child. He was an amazing dad and loved deeply by all those who knew him. It’s just so hard to wrap your head around these kinds of sudden losses, especially in those early days, and it feels so wrong imagining a child growing up without their parent. I’m wondering how you’ve been coping in the time since you last posted?


    Dear Jenv, Coming to terms with the reality of such a shocking event and its consequences is tough and can disturb one’s sense of safety. Understandably, you are feeling shocked, gutted, and various other emotions. Your friend and her husband sound like truly kind and caring people, so losing them suddenly and knowing what their passing means for their children is devastating. When I experienced the loss of a dear friend, I found that connecting with others who are also going through the same loss or connecting with a special friend who is happy to listen greatly helped me to cope. Please remember Griefline helpers are always just a phone call away if you need a listening ear. Has her funeral been announced since? Has it helped you to move forward with your grief? Take care of yourself at this time.

Viewing 3 replies - 1 through 3 (of 3 total)
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