Losing my partner

[sammie2410]

First time at doing anything like this…

I lost my partner unexpectedly in a car accident, he was young sooo full of life and we had plans for the near future, my whole world has been turned upside down.
He was only 2mins from home, he had asked me to drive him and I declined, sooo I have a lot of guilt/blame towards myself, like it should of been me or no-one. I’m really not coping/dealing with all the emotions/feelings I have switched of too everyday life and have just engaged with some professional help but first appointment is still a week away.
Since the accident I have spiraled into addiction where I tried to overdose 7 times 4 out of those 7times I was found non-responsive, I have a soon too be 10 yr old son sooo am screaming out for help or feedback

Topic

[VM-pink1]

Hi Sammie2410,

Firstly, it is so courageous of you to reach out, the first time especially can be tough so, welcome.

If you find yourself in crisis ,please call any of the following emergency numbers;
Emergency 000
Lifeline 13 11 14
Suicide call back service 1300 659 467 (ensure private number is not on).

It is completely understandable to be feeling overwhelmed and struggling to cope with the multitude of emotions, given your sudden and early loss. Here is a link to a resource on our website on coping with grief. It is important to know that we all grieve differently, we are all as unique as our grief and so how we cope will be unique too. Best to find those strategies that resonate with us.

Coping with Grief

We are here to talk about your loss, whenever you are ready.
Our number is 1300 845 745. We are on 7 days a week from 8am to 8pm.

Sending you armfuls of compassion…

[VM-sweetpea]

@sammie2410
I’m so sorry you’re going through such a heartbreaking and difficult time. It’s completely understandable that you’re feeling overwhelmed by everything that has happened, especially after losing your partner so suddenly. Grief can be so all-consuming, and when guilt mixes with it, it can feel unbearable. Please know that your partners death is not your fault, and there is no way you could have predicted the events that happened. We cant predict or control what happens in those moments, as much as we wish we could.

It’s really brave of you to reach out here to, share your story with us and to go further to seek professional help. I understand that first appointment must feel like it’s so far away right now but we are here for you in the meantime. Taking that step shows that you’re trying to fight through all of this, and that strength is something to hold onto. In the We are here for you so please continue reaching out as often as you need. Both to us and the other organizations VM-pink1 has suggested.

I hear how hard it must be to carry that weight of your loss, especially while balancing your son needing you. I can only imagine how challenging it is to feel that pain while also trying to be there for him. It’s okay to not have all the answers right now and to take things one moment at a time.

I’m wondering if there is any kinds of self care that you are implementing at the moment to help you when you are feeling so overwhelmed ?
Maybe something as small as going for a walk or watching your favorite tv show.

You’re not alone, and there’s no shame in needing help to get through this difficult time. Please keep holding on, especially with the support on the way. I have also added the national number for drug and alcohol support for your convenance.

National Alcohol and Other Drug Hotline – 24 hours a day, 7 days a week on 1800 250 015
Remember we are here for you and care about you.

[VM-Blizzy]

It takes courage to reach out. Know that you are not alone with your feelings and suicidal thoughts and experience with substance abuse, especially now during this tough time of uncertainty. Grief is a rollercoaster of emotions and taking each day and each hour as it comes might be all you are able to manage right now, and that is okay. Distracting yourself with an activity like listening to music or taking a shower seems to help other people that are going through grief.

It is great that you have a psycologist that you regularly see that can help you with grief through talk therapy, and you have received some recommendations for some hotlines to call, but if you feel that you still need extra support, know that your GP (doctor) is also there to help and chat to for a different perspective, and of course, Griefline has a hotline service 1300845745 that you can call anytime you need some support.

If you do get the strong urge to take your own life again, please reach out to any of these contacts for a chat before you go ahead with any plans you might have for self harm.
Even though you might not feel like it at the moment, know that you are stronger than you think and you can get through this with support.

Take care

[VM_soulcat8]

Hi Sammie2410,

It’s been almost a couple of weeks since you posted, and I just wanted to reach out and see how you are. Perhaps you’ve been to that first appointment already.
Please know that you’re never alone. You can call Griefline anytime, or post back up here and someone will reach out to you. Can I please encourage you to do whatever is needed to get through one day at a time, one hour at a time. There are definitely people who are willing to walk with you.

Take care.

[Author]

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