End of a relationship

[Bel95]

My boyfriend of almost 2 years broke up with me via text 2 days ago. Upon going to his place in a panic he refused to even acknowledge me.
Later we spoke and agreed to be friends. His reasons for dumping me was because of his extreme depression right now and what he’s going through. He can’t put me first because he has 2 kids and is about to be homeless for awhile.
Although I understand why, he doesn’t want to drag me down and doesn’t want to prolong my disappointment and pain.
I’m heartbroken though. I’ve cried so many tears now I’m numb. I’m scared, so scared. I’m scared to love again one day, I’m scared he will move on one day. Soon we will be nothing to each other and not be in love.
I’m glad we can be friends, but I hope he sticks to his word. But I’m scared of being hurt all over again and when I see him I’ll forget he’s just a ‘friend’ nothing more. He’s my EX. Wow.
I want this pain to go away so badly. I want to rewind to one year ago where we had the best holiday together and were so madly in love. The world stopped for a bit.

Topic

[Bugsy]

How are you travelling now? A few days is not very long and your feelings are quite understandable, especially being told over txt – I would’ve felt very hurt and betrayed. Be gentle and patient with yourself.

[Bel95]

I’m doing okay thanks. Good and bad moments. Knowing I haven’t Lost him as a friend is getting me through. I’m worried he won’t stick to his word and I’ll have to lose him all over again. I do believe we can be friends though, will be hard at first to mourn the actual relationship

[onlinecommunity]

Hi @Bel95, just checking in…how are things with you? We’re grateful you shared your grief experience with us here on the forums. Knowing that grief comes in many forms including relationship breakdowns is something we at Griefline are working hard to build awareness around in the community. You show such emotional maturity in understanding this and we hope that you have found ways to treat yourself accordingly – with self-compassion and kindness as you deal with the loss.
If you feel like reaching out we’d love to hear how things are going for you. Perhaps you have found ways to practice self-care and deal with the hurt. You can always check out the tools on the Griefline resource hub – the Smiling Mind mindfulness recording might be particularly calming for you. You can find it here.
Take care @Bel95. We are here for you. 🌸

[Motupatalu]

If you feel he is the right one then go and tell him that he need not get scared for what’s going on with him. People when hurt feel the other person won’t like to be with them, or they would not stick to them and make them worse. Tell him that pushing all away from him even a good friend like you won’t work. Try to heal by taking your help. Tell him you won’t get tired for sticking to him and listening to him. Go grab him in your arms and resolve. Also, these days narcissism cases are way too much in the relations. Just in case find out if he is being secrecy since someone from his own family is the cause of his distress like I read here signs of mother son enmeshment

[Author]

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