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Home » Topics » Loss of a loved one » "Don't think of me dying, think of me laughing."

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  • #14678
    onlinecommunity
    Keymaster

    In a recent interview singer Tom Jones spoke of working through his grief after the loss of his wife. Like all of us Jones struggled greatly with his grief, calling it the lowest part of his life, and fearing he wouldn’t get through it. Only after accepting there was nothing he could have done to save her from her lung cancer was he able to come to a point of moving forward. Stating “Before she died she said, “don’t think of me dying, think of me laughing.” that’s how I remember her. Now every time I step on stage, Linda is with me.”

    When celebrities talk about their grief and loss it reminds us that grief touches everyone and shows us that we are not alone when we feel helpless or hopeless. To help him through the dark times Jones chooses to think of the moments of joy he shared with his wife. Its a strategy that fits with the continuing bonds theory of grief recovery – maintaining a connection with our loved one by reminiscing about them, especially in a positive light.

    This easter long weekend we hope our Community Members are able to find some moments of joy when they think of their loved ones in happy times. You are welcome to share some of those moments with us here on the forums, by expressing the lows and the highs of our grief journey we can all help each other carry the burden of loss.

    Thinking of everyone today. We are here for you. 🌸

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  • #14748
    onlinecommunity
    Keymaster

    Welcome to the forums @henry-heartbreak, we are glad you’re here. Our hearts go out to you after the traumatic loss of your wife and we are here to support you in your grief. We thank you for sharing your grief experience as there are likely to be many other community members also struggling with the searing anguish, pain and anger that hits us after losing someone we loved.

    Here at Griefline – both on the Helpline and the forums, we support many people struggling with these almost unbearable emotions and thoughts. We hold space for them and invite them to express themselves fully and openly and we know that for some people we might be the only outlet for them to do so. We also work with people in different phases of grief – those who are stuck, confused or can’t make sense of it, those who feel guilt and remorse, and also those who are ready to look for meaning in their loss and want to find hope. Everybody’s grief experience is their own and we honour that.

    The forums are a place for everyone to express their unique grief experience no matter what it is. Like you say, grieving people need spaces to scream and cry and you are very welcome to do that here. So we’d welcome you to start your own topic and start the conversation.

    We are here for you 🌸

    #14747
    henry heartbreak
    Participant

    I’m sorry, but what a crock of shit. My wife finally succeeded in killing herself after trying to kill herself since she was eight years old (that’s tragedy enough in itself). Grieving people need spaces where they can scream and cry, not ‘find moments of joy’.

    #14736
    giraffe4
    Participant

    Love reaches into the past and reveals all the hurting and the laughing, and so we should never ignore any part of a person’s past life, as it is all valuable, in its way.

    Both the laughing, the crying, and even the dying. Each part of a person’s life is important to remember.

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