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I’m so sorry to hear about the loss of your father, and more recently, your father-in-law.
How hard to feel so helpless to support your father in the way you wanted. Yet you were determined to stay connected with him, through your daily phone calls to him.
I can hear how the passing of your father-in-law has brought up memories, to the point where each day feels a struggle and you’re scared you won’t manage through your pain.
The best you can do is take one small step at a time, such as sharing your post. Be gentle with yourself and your husband to work out what you need each moment of each day. Griefline or Good Mourning podcasts may provide some reassurance with how you are feeling and help you understand grief and how to support yourself through this intense pain.
Reaching out to us at Griefline, 1300 845 745, can give you space to talk about how you are and support you to work out what you need from here. You can book a call through https://calendly.com/griefline_griefsupport/20min?month=2022-11.