Home › Forums › Loss of a loved one › Loss of best friend then mother then father. Feeling lost. › Reply To: Loss of best friend then mother then father. Feeling lost.
Hello diwags,
it can be natural for us to believe that time will ‘heal all things’, but unfortunately, grief often doesn’t work that way, as it seems you are experiencing. I’m so sorry to hear what you’ve gone through, I can only imagine how painful it must be. I can feel the sadness in your words, and your hope to heal.
Losing someone we love is always hard, but losing several people so close together must have been traumatic for you. Trauma can interact with grief and lead to something called prolonged (or complicated) grief. This is where you can feel like you are stuck in one place and feel unable to get past the losses you’ve experienced, which sounds like it might be relevant to you. There is some more information on that here: https://griefline.org.au/resources/types-of-grief/, if that helps.
Firstly, I want to say that acceptance of how you are feeling is a good first step; it’s okay to be where you are, right now, given what you’ve experienced. Feeling sad and crying often, seeing reminders everywhere, these are normal responses to grief and loss and there is no time-limit on them, especially in circumstances like yours. I feel that you are perfectly valid in what you’re feeling, and I think you’ve shown great strength and courage coming to Griefline and telling us a little of your story. Sometimes it’s hard to see our own strengths, but reaching out and sharing, asking for help or understanding, these are absolutely strengths to build on. I’m sure you have many others too, and now is a good time to begin looking for them.
I also think it’s important to find and use all the supports you can. Grief is hard for everyone, and overcoming such a series of losses might need every support available to you. The people here in the forum are all people who’ve felt grief and understand its sting, and are very supportive to share with. The Griefline help line is there Monday to Friday from early to late, to help you if you feel overwhelmed – and Griefline also offers some other services and supports, depending on where you are in Australia. Diwags, I hope you reach out for some form of support or counselling, reach out to your family and friends and support networks, because there is no need to be alone in this – we are there with you.