Home › Forums › Loss of a loved one › How to navigate Early Grief, Lost my 6 year old daughter 3 weeks ago. › Reply To: How to navigate Early Grief, Lost my 6 year old daughter 3 weeks ago.
oh my, those ng tubes, my son vomited them up a thousand times, they eventually anchored a gastronomy tube in his stomach as he needed daily interal feeding. I remember looking after the central line at home was so scary. I’m left-handed, could never get the ‘s’ bend right. My son had a million procedures/surgeries/radiation, and I’ve held his hand throughout each and every, but I will never forget the first one. I remember 5 doctors all talking to me, saying things beyond my belief and then fainting. wtf, I just took my son for a blood test, suspected glandular fever , get a script and within an hour we’re in an ambulance , docs telling me he might not survive the night?
We were told that many times, but I never accepted it as a possibility. Don’t take my child, I wailed every single night. Yet it happened.
I also wake each night in the early hours, doesn’t matter what time I go to bed, I just find myself staring out the window at 4am, waiting, yet also dreading the light of a new day. I remember when I had my first born son and he was screaming his head off 24/7, I asked my neighbour who had a 4 yr old, does it get better? She just smiled at me and said nup, it just get’s different. Honest, best advice I ever heard xx