Hi @tiki2072016, it’s good to hear from you again. Thanks for checking in and sharing with the forums – we value your warm, open and familiar voice here. 😊
It sounds like you’ve been navigating some really tough days and feelings lately including the 3-month anniversary of your beautiful wife’s passing. Your description of ‘crying on the inside’ is really moving, and it sounds like a very intense somatic feeling. A lot of people are unaware that we first ‘feel’ our emotions in our muscle and nervous systems (known as affects) before a signal is sent to our mind to create the emotion. And because every affect is expressed through a different sensation it sometimes helps to track these and get to know them. Have you tried writing in a journal? This could be a good place to record these affects and try to put them into words.
@tiki2072016, in case you haven’t come across it we wanted to point out @dlstewart’s post on @JackM’s topic “Lost my partner a month ago tomorrow” from April 16 addressed to you, @JackM and @GL-Friend…just because it’s always nice to know when people are reaching out to us. 🌈
Keep on taking good care of yourself and we look forward to hearing from you soon. We are here for you 🌸.