Dealing with grief during the new year: Finding comfort and hope
The New Year is traditionally a time for celebration, fresh beginnings, and optimism. However, for those dealing with loss, it can amplify feelings of grief and loneliness. The contrast between personal sorrow and the world’s festive atmosphere can be overwhelming. This guide offers practical strategies, comforting insights, and resources to help people dealing with Grief during the New Year.
Why the new year can be challenging
The New Year often triggers reflection and the setting of goals. For those grieving, this can:
- Highlight the absence of a loved one.
- Stir feelings of guilt for finding joy.
- Amplify the pressure to move on.
- Make traditions and celebrations feel incomplete.
Recognising these challenges is the first step towards coping effectively and dealing with grief during the new year.
6 points on how to cope with grief during the new year
Dealing with grief during the New Year can be particularly challenging, as the start of a new year often brings heightened emotions and societal expectations. This guide provides practical tips to help you navigate this time with compassion and resilience.
1. Acknowledge your feelings
The New Year can be an emotionally charged time, especially when you’re grieving. It’s important to give yourself permission to feel whatever emotions come up—whether it’s sadness, anger, numbness, or even moments of joy. Grief is unique to everyone and doesn’t follow a set timeline, so there’s no need to suppress or rush through your feelings. Instead, allow yourself to experience them fully. Journaling can be a powerful tool during this time. Writing down your thoughts and emotions can help you process your grief, gain clarity, and find a sense of release. Remember, it’s okay to not feel “okay,” and acknowledging your emotions is the first step toward healing.
2. Set realistic expectations
The start of a new year often comes with societal pressures to set resolutions, embrace change, and feel a sense of renewal. However, when you’re grieving, these expectations can feel overwhelming. It’s important to remind yourself that the New Year doesn’t demand immediate happiness or drastic changes. Give yourself the grace to navigate this time at your own pace. Avoid overcommitting to social gatherings or events that might feel emotionally taxing. It’s perfectly fine to decline invitations or leave early if you need to. Honour your limits and focus on what feels manageable and comforting to you.
3. Honour your loved one
Finding ways to remember and celebrate the life of your loved one can bring comfort during the New Year. Light a candle in their memory or share stories about them with family and friends who understand your grief. Reflecting on their life and the positive impact they had can foster a sense of connection even in their absence. You might also consider making a charitable donation in their name to an organisation or cause they cared deeply about. These acts of remembrance not only honour their memory but also help you feel closer to them as you move forward.
4. Lean on your support network
Grief can feel isolating, but you don’t have to face it alone. Lean on your support network—whether it’s friends, family, or a grief support group. Sharing your feelings with someone who understands can lighten the emotional burden and provide a sense of solidarity. In Australia, organisations like Griefline offer invaluable support through their helpline and online forums. Whether you prefer a quiet conversation with a trusted friend or connecting with a larger group, reaching out can make a significant difference in your healing process.
5. Create new traditions
Sometimes, old traditions can feel too painful to continue after the loss of a loved one. In these instances, creating new traditions can help you find meaning and comfort during the New Year. Consider spending the day volunteering for a cause that resonates with you, as acts of service can provide a sense of purpose and connection. Alternatively, you might start a gratitude journal to focus on positive memories and moments of appreciation throughout the year. If celebrations feel too overwhelming, plan a quiet and reflective evening to honour your emotions and personal needs.
6. Practise self-care
Prioritising your physical and mental wellbeing is crucial when coping with grief during the New Year. Maintaining a regular sleep schedule can help stabilise your mood and energy levels, while nourishing foods provide the fuel your body needs to cope with stress. Gentle exercise, like yoga or walking, can release endorphins that improve your overall sense of wellbeing. Mindfulness and meditation practices can also offer a grounding effect, helping you stay present and calm in moments of emotional distress. Explore apps like Smiling Mind or Calm for guided meditations tailored to grief and emotional healing. Taking care of yourself isn’t selfish—it’s an essential part of navigating this challenging time.
Supporting someone in grief during the new year
If a friend or family member is grieving, your support can make a difference by helping them in dealing with grief during the new year:
What to say
- “I’m here for you if you need anything.”
- “It’s okay to feel however you’re feeling right now.”
- “Would you like to share some memories about [their loved one]?”
What not to say
- “Aren’t you over it yet?”
- “They’re in a better place.”
- “You should be happy, it’s a new year.”
How to help
- Offer practical support, like running errands or cooking meals.
- Invite them to low-pressure activities, such as a coffee catch-up.
- Check in regularly, even after the holiday period.
General questions people ask about grief during the new year
Why is grief harder during the holidays?
Holidays and the new year emphasise togetherness, which can intensify the absence of a loved one. Traditions and milestones can feel particularly painful.
How do you deal with new year’s resolutions while grieving?
Focus on small, achievable goals that prioritise self-care and healing. Examples include journaling weekly or taking a daily walk.
The hardest losses to grieve
Grief is deeply personal, but some losses are universally acknowledged as particularly challenging:
- Loss of a child: often considered the most painful due to its unnatural order.
- Loss of a spouse: involves losing both a partner and a shared future.
- Sudden loss: leaves little time to prepare or say goodbye.
Understanding these nuances can help in providing or seeking support in dealing with grief during the new year.
Moving forward with grief during the new year
Grief doesn’t mean forgetting, it means learning to live with the loss. As you navigate the new year:
- Take one day at a time.
- Seek professional help if needed.
- Remember, healing is a journey, not a destination.
If you’re struggling in dealing with grief during the new year, know that you are not alone. Reach out to loved ones or professional support services like Griefline to guide you through this time. Let this year be a step toward finding peace and cherishing the memories of those you’ve lost.
You don’t have to carry this weight alone. Our caring volunteers are here to listen. Call 1300 845 745 to speak with someone who understands.
Related resources
Grief: A comprehensive guide to understanding and navigating loss
Quotes about the Loss of a Loved One: Finding Reliable Comfort in Words
Poems for Loss of a Loved One: Words That Comfort and Heal
Songs for the Loss of a Loved One: A Guide to Healing Through Music
If you are experiencing crisis, or are worried about yourself or someone else, please contact Lifeline by phoning 13 11 14 or by texting 0477 13 11 14
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