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I’m new to the forums so apologies if I’m doing the wrong thing.
My mum is in palliative care right now: they say she has 1-3 months left. I know I should be grateful that I still have her in my life, but I’m struggling to cope with the impending death.
She is getting weaker and sicker as I watch, and has already organised VAD (voluntary assisted dying) for when things get too bad.
I can’t shake the Depression. I want to be there for her but I’m so tired and scattered all the time; unable to cry and then bawling; struggling with grief as if she’d already gone. I’ve always been afraid of dying and wonder if that fear is driving my breakdown? I know my Mum doesn’t believe in an afterlife so that makes me nervous too.
How did people cope in the leadup to death (if they did have warning)? If I’m this much of a mess now I’m worried I’ll either be hysterical or numb when she actually dies. Neither is good.
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