Grief, grief and more grief.

[justme123]

Two uncles, an auntie, three grandparents, my cousin.

Two of them were cancer deaths.
Two were car crashes.
The others were heart attacks.

All from the same side of the family.

The first death was when I was 11yrs old (uncle in car crash) and the most recent was last week (auntie with cancer).

We are a very close family. I feel numb. I’m doing everything I can to numb my mind more and not think or feel.

I walk around in a daze. Or sit and stare out of the window for hours.

Topic

[VM-rose]

Dear @justme123, I am deeply sorry for your loss. As mentioned by @vmbetelgeuse, it is important to reach out, seek professional support and practise self-care. You have done an amazing job of reaching out here on the Griefline forum. You can also request a callback at a time that suits you. As you have experienced such profound loss in such quick succession, it is completely understandable that you would be feeling numb. In order to try to release your emotions, perhaps you could try writing about your feelings. You could also try writing letters to your departed loved ones. You can also continue to connect with others by using the Griefline forum. It’s so important during this incredibly difficult time to connect with others who are going through grief and loss. As @VM-willowtree said, remember to be kind to yourself. We’re here to listen and support you.

[VM-willowtree]

my heart goes out to you @justme123

you have had so much loss in your life. So much meaningful and cumulative loss. I can not imagine what you are going through, what you already have gone through since you were 11, but know that I hear you and want to acknowledge that significance.
The love you have for your family is a beautiful thing.

thank you for sharing in this space. Don’t underestimate the power your sharing has. For others to know they are not alone in their grief and feelings of numbness, it is a powerful and sacred thing you have offered. I so admire your courage to express where you are currently at and I know that I am not the only one. I see so, SO much strength in what you’ve told us today.

And know you are absolutely not alone in this. Sometimes all you can do is sit and stare out the window. That feeling of numbness and nothingness is something many people experience after their loss. Do what you got to do to look after yourself, and remember to be kind to yourself. In all the grief and loss you have experienced in your life you would know that there is no set duration for grief, no specific trajectory it follows. Hold patience and compassion for yourself in this time.
If you wanted here are some practical strategies for coping with that loss:

Coping with Grief

A gentle guide to self-care after loss: The E.A.S.T. approach

Please continue to share if you want to, we are here to listen.

[vmbetelgeuse]

I’m truly sorry to hear about the immense loss your family has experienced. The weight of grief can be overwhelming, especially when it accumulates over time. Losing loved ones to different causes can leave us feeling disoriented and emotionally drained.

Numbness is a common response during such difficult times. Our minds and hearts are trying to shield us from the full impact of the pain. But remember, it’s okay to feel. Grief is a natural process, and allowing yourself to experience the emotions — whether it’s sadness, anger, or confusion — is essential for healing.

Here are a few gentle suggestions:

Reach Out: Lean on your close family members during this time. Share memories, stories, and feelings. Sometimes, talking about our loved ones helps us process the loss.

Seek Professional Support: Consider speaking to a counselor or therapist. They can guide you through the grieving process and provide coping strategies.

Self-Care: Take care of yourself physically and emotionally. Rest, eat well, and allow yourself moments of quiet reflection. It’s okay to sit by the window and let your thoughts flow.

Memorialize: Create a memorial or tribute for your departed family members. It could be a photo album, a letter, or even planting a tree in their memory.
Remember, grief doesn’t follow a linear path. It’s messy, unpredictable, and unique to each person. Allow yourself the space to feel, and don’t hesitate to seek professional help if needed.

Remember you can always call Griefline’s Helpline on 1300 845 745. They are open 7 days a week from 8am-8pm.

You’re not alone in this journey.

[Author]

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