Hello, I’m using this forum as a journal, hope that’s ok, I kinda need this, so thank you for listening.
I’m all signed up for the online support group in May. Wondering if I might meet any participants here in the forums beforehand?
Another nice young man from griefline called me, I don’t usually answer unknown no.s but glad I did, as he put me in touch with other services they can offer.
Please, anyone reading, there is actually help at hand. I may not have reached out myself, but I want to be the best version, I can possibly be, for my son’s twin sister, my 2 elder sons, and of course, what Jeremy would want for me.
So today, I finally gathered the courage to get my haircut, it was much needed. Normally, I’d book 2 wks in advance, but appt next day, I suspect my friend just cleared a spot. Please understand she has cut all of my kids hair, shaved Jeremy’s hair before chemo, styled them for year 12 formals etc, and has 5 of her own, similar ages.
My first social interaction with someone that “knows”. I was anxious – mainly for them – how I’d be greeted. but all was good was taken straight to the basin for the best shampoo and deep conditioning treatment, omg I love the massage. Renee, my beloved hairdresser/friend gives me a hug, (only kiwis can do – it’s kinda spiritual – I felt the energy) and shed a tear together. She tried to explain how she’s lost for words, when she spends all day chatting with customers, but it was a comfortable silence, shared together.
I appreciated that, I completely understand how hard is it for others how to approach this new me, especially if they have kids the same age.
I’m looking forward to the counselling, but please bear with me if I journal some thoughts meantime, they’ll ask me to reflect on my ‘grief journey’ for sure.
I’m hoping my words resonates somehow with others xxx