I am sorry for what you are going through. I recently lost my Mum and lost my Dad when i was 24 years of age. I can never and still don’t understand loss but want to tell you that it’s important you look after yourself and take the time to tell your Dad what you feel is important. Living with regrets is painful or living with what you ‘should’ have said or ‘could’ have said but don’t can make grief so much harder as well. Losing one parent is hard enough let alone two! All I have to say is value the time you have left with your Dad- tell him what you feel is important to tell him- not only what you think he wants to hear but what you want to share with him. It might be a favourite memory or something funny he always says or a funny look. Most of all- if you are a hugging type- hug him lots. I would do anything to be able to give my Mum and Dad just one more hug or to see their smile just one more time. Grief sucks and is exhausting, but I feel through the grief if you can hang onto living with no regrets regarding the connection you have with your loved one I feel it helps the grieving process so much more. Amongst all this uncertainty and grief you are experiencing please look after yourself. You cannot give to someone else if your glass is empty and you have nothing to give.(I hope that makes sense). Take care. I feel your pain.