Loss of my Mum

[daniellee]

My Mum died suddenly last September, I simm her so much. My family is down to just me, my sister and my grandmother, who is my one remaining grandparent. My stepdad is no longer talking to us following legal issues with Mum’s will. All this has triggered my depression and anxiety as well. I’m scared of of what will happen to me when my grandmother dies, I don’t want to lose anyone else. Mum always fought for me, she got me help when I first had depression. I miss that, that she’s not here to help me now, and I feel alone.

Topic

[VM-flo]

Dear Danielle,

I am sorry to hear about your loss and the struggles you are facing right now, I can’t imagine how that would feel for you. Thank you for reaching out and sharing your experience about your loss, it sounds like your mother was always there for you.

I am sorry to hear you have had trouble reaching someone to speak to at Griefline, I hope you have managed to get through since you wrote last.
At times there can be a wait, and I understand how frustrating that can be. I hope it wasn’t too long and that support was available when you needed it.

It is comforting to hear that your grandmother and sister are there for you and that you do have support. But I also understand that it’s not the same, and that can feel so hard. It’s okay to miss what you had, and to feel the ache of that difference.

Please do reach out again if you would like to talk to someone. Take care 🙂

[daniellee]

My sister and grandmother are my main sources of support, and I have been seeing a psychologist. I have tried multiple times to call griefline but no one ever answers, it’s just the automated message telling me that all the people are on other calls.

[VM-Johann]

Dear Danielle – I’m glad you were able to reach out at this time, and want to assure you that you are not alone.

I can see how much you are still grieving over losing your mum, and I’m so sorry for that loss. Clearly she has been such an important support for you while dealing with your own health issues. I think it is completely understandable that you would find yourself in a very difficult place trying to negotiate that loss, compounded with difficult family dynamics and having a fear of further loss with an older grandmother.

Are you in a position to be able to reactivate any of the support structures your mum helped with in the past – like a GP or psychologist? It sounds like at this time you need to have additional support around you, and if you are able to reconnect with services who know you and your history they could be best placed to help you navigate this complex time.

I don’t know if your sister is dependent in some way on you, or old enough to be a source of support, or whether you are able to talk to your grandmother about what you are feeling right now?

Griefline has a lot of good resources to refer to that may be of help https://griefline.org.au/resources/

Especially if you are feeling overwhelmed, please reach out to the telephone helpline (1300 845 745 between 8am and 8pm EST) and there will be someone to talk to you so you feel less alone.

Please stay connected with us, the fact you were able to reach out at this time and have a clear view of the multiple dynamics triggering your health is a strength that can be built on to find the next steps you need to take.

[Author]

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