Grief for oneself

[davidb316]

I feel like I’m existing; dead already. All I’ve been through. Hard to put in to words. Where is life? Where’s revival in my life; my heart?
More years behind than there are ahead.
Raped, bullied, told to kill myself by a “family” member, survived suicide attempt and such. It created such anxiety in me.
Not sure what to do. Just marching along to the end, it feels like.
Not wanting to die but, if death called, I’d be thinking of embracing it like a friend knowing it’s over….it’s finally over.
Not even sure I’m making sense.

Topic

[VM-Serenity66]

Dear davidb316,

Thank you for reaching out and sharing with us. I want you to know that your feelings are valid and make perfect sense in light of the pain and difficulties you’ve experienced throughout your life. It takes courage to express your thoughts and emotions, especially when life feels overwhelming and hopeless.
It sounds like you’ve been carrying the weight of trauma and pain for a long time, and it’s completely natural to feel exhausted and disillusioned. Please know that healing and hope are still possible, even when it feels like you’ve been in darkness for a long time.

If you feel you are at imminent risk of taking your own life, please do not hesitate to call 000 for urgent help.
Lifeline volunteers are on hand to help you with crisis support on 13 11 14 (24 hrs), or Suicide Callback Service on 1300 659 467

Most importantly, know that you are not alone, and your life has value. Healing and personal growth are not linear processes, and setbacks are a natural part of the journey. With the right support and resources, it’s possible to rediscover a sense of hope and purpose.

If you’re not in immediate danger, and feel up to a compassionate conversation about your sense of loss and grief, please reach out to our Helpline (1300 845 745 8am-8pm) to connect with a caring volunteer.

Take care. We’re here for you.

[Author]

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