Loss of brother

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This topic has 2 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 18 hours, 21 minutes ago by VM-stevie.

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August 4, 2025 at 1:03 am #40756

ruby0608
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Hi my name is Ruby
In march of 2024, i lost my eldest brother to a fight outbreak which unfortunately he ended up passing away from.
Since he passed i have struggled to recover from it and the thought of if how he died.
He was 35 and the night we got the call it broke me and my family.
I have struggled to believe its real sometimes and have wanted to call or text him as i always went to him for my problems and since then i have been bottling all my emotions and it’s been getting a lot worse lately.
Although there are times where im happy, when im alone i just feel so numb and empty sometimes.
And yes, i know its been over a year and im just writing this now but i really want to learn to accept that’s he’s really gone and i won’t ever see him again.
As horrible as that might sound, i want to be able to live my life and make him proud but im really struggling with that right now and have been since the day he passed away.

Thanks for listening.
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August 4, 2025 at 7:50 pm #40842

VM-stevie
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Hi Ruby,

So sorry to hear about your loss, and well done for reaching out even after some time has passed. There’s definitely no timeline for grief, it can linger for a long time or pop up when you don’t expect it.
I lost a really close friend when I was younger, and I definitely still experienced a feeling of numbness after a year, and it would still happen sometimes even a couple years later. I found some mindfulness helped, like naming things I can see, or going for a walk and trying to notice things of a certain colour. Just something to drag my attention back to actually noticing things, instead of zoning out. Are there any things you do that help you feel more present?
Jumping on the forums is a great step, there’s lots of support here. Go gently with yourself and take some small steps, you’re doing a great job already!

August 4, 2025 at 6:42 pm #40841

VMToby
Participant

Dear Ruby,
Thank you for reaching out to us at Griefline to share what a devastating time you and your whole Family have been going through since March 2024.
To lose a brother so young and in such a tragic way I can only imagine is devastating and as you said s hard to believe it is real sometimes.
Your feeling at this time are so normal ,happiness and then numb and so empty.Eveyone’s experience of grief is so different.

Griefline is here 7 days a week from 8 am -8pm Victorian time and our number is 1300 845 745 if you ever feel like talking about what you are experiencing or to talk about your brother and what you miss about him.
Ou
Our website has lots of resources about grief and loss and there is the option to join a six week zoom group for those who have lost someone.
Self care is important too and there is imformation about this on the website.

Moving forward is not easy and you are not ‘horrible’ in wanting to live your life now. It is about learning to live with the loss alongside you living your life.This is not easy to do.
Be kind to yourself and lovely to hear from you Ruby.
Take Care.
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Loss of brother

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