Suicide Survivor Guilt

Hello,
It has been nearly 8 years since I lost my mum to suicide when I was 18 years old. I have since seen counsellors, psychologists and psychiatrists and have been diagnosed with cPTSD + retrospective ADHD. I have been trying to cope with my unhealthy tendency towards feelings of guilt and a false sense of responsibility for her death – one of those strategies is starting EMDR treatment. I can say that this is helping with some degree of my childhood trauma, but the overall grief of losing mum is still heavy on me even now.
I have been told that going to a group for suicide survivors would help me but have not heard of any such groups where I live. By reaching out here, I am hopeful that there are others like me, and, if so, perhaps we can attract enough interest to start a new group lead by Lifeline or a similar professional organisation. It is preferred if this remains a safe place where people may attend anonymously, yet still gain the beenfits of group therapy/shared experiences.

Please attention this to any relevant overseers in the Lifeline group

Until then, please feel free to comment or share your experiences with suicide and how you have been able to cope. I feel this type of guilt/grief in particular is less spoken of and seems to get triggered more often than a death that was of natural causes.

PLUR and condolences xx