Seeing grief as a gift

This poem is something that I found particularly helpful recently, it is from Mary Oliver and titled The Uses of Sorrow:

–
Someone I loved once gave me

a box full of darkness.

It took me years to understand

that this, too, was a gift.
–

The depth of our pain is a gift that tells us how much we loved. In my case the despair and sense of loss I felt at the loss of my father and the missed chances to resolve our issues reminds me daily to try and ensure that doesn’t happen between myself and my own children.

That box is dark indeed, but it is a gift that may give for the rest of my life; as long as I’m wise enough to use it.

I hope this helps others, too.