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  • #13873
    Effie
    Participant

    Hi
    I have been caring for my nephews n niece for 8 years
    It’s a carer situation. My husbands family has done nothing but abuse me for 7 and a half years. My husband does not support me or stick up for me he just makes excuses. I am sick and he is more worried about everyone else than what’s in front of his face. And has done this for years. He tells me I’m living in the past to let it go. But when ur traumatised by toxic people being his family, abusing me and blaming me for their drug addiction and mistakes it’s not past it’s trauma and present.
    I’m so alone I feel I lead a single life. I feel I’m being used Cos it’s easy cos I’m an idiot. He keeps calling them his kids.
    They are not his kids.
    I get abused for years and now he thinks it’s ok to have a relationship with his family, like it’s ok. Well it’s not I don’t see this working out. I’m sick of being used, I’m sick of being abused and not supported by the one person that should. I can only put it to one thing. He just does not give a damn. Blood is thicker than water.
    But my life is gone now. My life is not my own it’s been dictated by morons.
    I’m sick of this.
    And now loosing my dad recently I just want to be with him. This is crap. This is not the life I signed up for.
    I’m actually hating everyone in my life
    Enough is enough.
    Christmas was shit and I’m sick of being judged.
    Lost my marbles, right.

Viewing 10 replies - 11 through 20 (of 21 total)
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    Replies
  • #14086
    Effie
    Participant

    Anger yes abandonment no.
    Idiot, sucker yes
    I don’t wish this life experience on anyone.
    I’m hoping you difficultly is not draining, I’m hoping u can get through whatever it is, no judgement, I’ve never judged but I get judged and I guess I’m lost because of it.
    Ef

    #14087
    amojel
    Participant

    This is about you and not me because, right at this moment, I’m here for you. I’m pleased that you acknowledged there’s some anger but I’d also like you to consider the feelings of abandonment from the people around you. It sounds to me like you were the one who took responsibility for your father and other things and no one else could be bothered, and even in the way you described your relationship with your father. Trying to put myself in your position, I’d feel really angry and let down. Who the heck/hell was there to support me (in my imagination of your experience) so who was there for you? No one by the sounds of it. Okay; so what can we do with that? Well, for a start we can probably acknowledge that you’re pretty damn tough. What do you think?

    #14088
    Effie
    Participant

    No one supported me and still no one supports me
    But in saying this as there is no tone in writing I’m feeling overwhelmed right now.
    Yes I’m angry and was angry and now I’m just angry at myself for allowing things to get to this stage.

    I’ve allowed people to treat me like this
    But I’m now at a no more stage.
    My siblings can go to hell. My husbands family can go to hell. I’m just done with it.
    It was easier with dad here Cos at least I knew where I stood.

    #14089
    Effie
    Participant

    As far as the kids go, we’ll it’s easy for the family to pass blame on me for the kids upbringing Cos they are still in denial about the drug abuse.
    They have nothing to loose blaming me for anything. They sure as hell don’t want the kids, if they did they would have fought for them. But not once did anyone fight.
    Just she’ll be right. Glorified babysitter and we see them once a year and act like it’s a normal happy family.
    Whilst I’ve been abused and traumatised by the most toxic people I know.
    No judgement just saying.

    #14090
    amojel
    Participant

    Hi. Trying to write to you but been blocked. Not sure what’s going on.

    #14091
    amojel
    Participant

    Hi Effie,

    I tried to reply to your previous message and it didn’t go. I got a response to say it was blocked. Not sure what’s happening. I think it would be good to keep up some contact. I’ll send you a personal email if necessary.

    #14092
    Effie
    Participant

    Hi
    I’m
    Not sure what’s going on.

    #14093
    amojel
    Participant

    Hi,

    I have no idea what occurred last night but I’ll try to be in touch later on today. I have a really busy weekend ahead so if you write and I don’t respond particularly quickly, I’ll write when it’s easy.

    #16300
    jamifids
    Participant

    Hi
    I have been caring for my nephews n niece for 8 years
    It’s a carer situation. My husbands family has done nothing but abuse me for 7 and a half years. My husband does not support me or stick up for me he just makes excuses. I am sick and he is more worried about everyone else than what’s in front of his face. And has done this for years. He tells me I’m living in the past to let it go. But when ur traumatised by toxic people being his family, abusing me and blaming me for their drug addiction and mistakes it’s not past it’s trauma and present.
    I’m so alone I feel I lead a single life. I feel I’m being used Cos it’s easy cos I’m an idiot. He keeps calling them his kids.
    They are not his kids.
    I get abused for years and now he thinks it’s ok to have a relationship with his family, like it’s ok. Well it’s not I don’t see this working out. I’m sick of being used, I’m sick of being abused and not supported by the one person that should. I can only put it to one thing. He just does not give a damn. Blood is thicker than water.
    But my life is gone now. My life is not my own it’s been dictated by morons.
    I’m sick of this.
    And now loosing my dad recently I just want to be with him. This is crap. This is not the life I signed up for.
    I’m actually hating everyone in my life
    Enough is enough.
    Christmas was shit and I’m sick of being judged.
    Lost my marbles, right.

    You need support and time to deal with the situation. You don’t need to make any quick decisions. Think about what the future holds for you.

    • This reply was modified 1 year, 2 months ago by jamifids.
    #16309
    Effie
    Participant

    Hi all
    An update
    It’s a year nearly since my dad passed away already. I miss him everyday. I’m still being treated like crap. I’m disrespected by my husband
    He speaks to me with rudeness with no apology he speaks to others like honey but to me he’s a jerk. And I have to be ok with it. Well I’m not anymore.
    He does not deserve me n I’m sick of being used like a glorified house maid for his brothers kid’s.
    Today he was commenting on girls at the beach n telling the older boy to ho show them how to kick a ball.
    I believe it was him that wanted to go. But disrespected me to my face.
    Not to mention being on his phone when I talk so I guess it’s time to see a solicitor.
    I’m not well his family has made me sick and he allowed it and sticks up fir them when they abused me for years he never asks how I am at all. He is rude full stop. I think he is here cos he’s expecting I’m gonna die so he will get it all.
    All I can say is thank god we don’t have kids together
    But I’m fed up. He needs to go.
    I’ve been married for 30 years and I’ve always been alone. Leading a single life cos he is selfish. Simply a pig.

Viewing 10 replies - 11 through 20 (of 21 total)
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