Hi @ankhira, I’m so sorry to hear about the loss of your sister. I imagine it must be so tough to have had to admit that it was real. It sounds like you have incredible strength and resilience to keep going and I am glad to hear that you are able to recognise that your sister would want you to be happy. I found it helpful when losing my friend to pay tribute to her, I did this by getting a locket and adding a picture of her inside of it, that way every day she is right by my heart walking with me. I also wrote a letter to her, to express how hard I was finding navigating life without them. I found it helped to alleviate some guilt as I let them be a part of my journey.
I hope the resources @vmulan shared are helpful to you as well.
Wishing you all the best and hope to hear from you soon.