Hi widowerat45 and welcome, I’m glad you feel safe here, I know it can be hard to talk about.
I think night time is the worst for many of us. For me it’s the early hours between 2-5am.
“the tigers come at night, soft as thunder” I get that. That’s why I have background music on all the time.
Bravo for the healthy routine but oh my, you performed cpr on your own wife, that’s a lot to unpack.
I hope others will respond soon, thinking of you also bereavedwife and all reading xx