@championphilyra, I deeply felt your last post, “why are the people whom I love perishing around me rapidly?”
The truth is I don’t know why people leave us. I wonder if anyone knows. Sometimes I think grief and loss caused by passing of someone are a bit of a mystery because we are stuck with this “why”. When my mother died, I wandered the exact same thing “why did she go”. I don’t have an answer for myself either… I just picked myself up and kept going, some days it’s hard, and some days I don’t even think about. You are strong.